The Lines of Joy

I recently ran into an old friend at a restaurant. She was celebrating her birthday with her friends and I gave her a celebratory hug. She simply replied that she was just relieved that she was still in her 20’s. It got me thinking…how do I feel about being in my 30’s? How do I feel about aging? How do I feel that my friend basically dreads being my age? Legitimately my stress with aging is disappearing by the hour.

I can honestly say that I have never been more comfortable with myself at 35. I feel more wholly me everyday. The expectations I have on myself are on whatever makes me and my family happy. It is SUCH a beautiful place to be.

Here is the thing, if I am being honest, I have a few too many wrinkles than I would like, I have so many awkward stretch marks and I have way too many gray hairs showing through. But, I also recognize every single wrinkle on my face represents a moment in my life that has made me who I am today…genuine laugh lines encircle my eyes and deep and heartbreaking sadness is etched into my forehead. Every stretch mark is a pull from literally creating my children and every gray hair, including the patch of silver hair on my left temple, represents a time of perseverance, of making it through the other side.

I feel like I am becoming more and more forgiving and gracious with myself as I move forward in my life. I recognize my strengths and my heart way before my outside appearance now and I imagine that will only become more and more the case as the years move forward. I am definitely far from perfect, but I also feel less stressed about my weaknesses as well. It is almost like I am just accepting of myself….flaws and all….take me or leave me!

I probably won’t feel so comfortable with age the night before my 40th birthday but I hope I will. I know I will feel better about turning 40 than I did about turning 30. I guess what I am saying is, that old friend of mine, or young friend of mine 😂, doesn’t realize how amazed she will be with herself in 5 years. As women we have told ourselves that getting older is the enemy.  Age is just a number, but if you could measure the heart…I have more capacity for love than I ever knew was possible and that grows every day. The human spirit is a beautiful gift and those wrinkles, stretch marks and gray hairs? I guess they are too! A gift of strength. I can do hard things. We all can.

4 thoughts on “The Lines of Joy

  1. Betsy

    Such a lovely post. You are absolutely spot on. I am 10 years older, and can tell you that you will be OK turning 40. Heck, I really thought 30 was fine. I’m of the embrace something you cannot do anything about camp.

    I too, have a patch of gray hair on my left temple. My only patch, with a few grays sprinkled around. I’m not as OK with the gray!! I do dye my hair back to its natural dark brown. But I’m working on being more accepting of them. Such a petty thing to worry about in my book.

    • Tate Party of 8

      I definitely have dyed my hair before! Hey, I put makeup on and use anti wrinkle creams. I guess my point is that you still can embrace it! Thank you for your sweet words!

  2. Amy

    This is beautiful and so are you! I turned 30 last year and was so excited about leaving the 20’s begins. I too feel more comfortable and content with who I am right now more than ever before. It’s a great and freeing feeling to accept ourselves for who we are.

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